Choose Your Friends Carefully!

Do not be deceived: evil company corrupts good habits.

1 Corinthians 15:33

My dear Proverbs 31 women in progress,

I hope you’re well since my last post. Today, my post will be quite short and will deal with friendship.

How should you choose your friends? How can your friends influence your life for better or for worse?

To answer that question, let’s examine the story of Amnon and Jonadab.

The story of Amnon and Jonadab

In a previous post, I analyzed the story of Amnon and Tamar. Well, for this analysis, I’ll go back to this story. The relationship between Amnon and Jonadab is addressed in 2 Samuel 13 if you want to review it.

Amnon, the eldest son of King David, was in love in Tamar, his half-sister. He was so in love that he fell ill. One day, his best friend Jonadab asked him why his health was vanishing day after day.

Now, let me introduce Jonadab to you. The Bible precises that Jonadab was the son of Shimeah, King David’s brother. So Jonadab is also his cousin. So you would think that family members have the best intentions for you, right?

Well, when Jonadab heard that Amnon was in love with his half-sister and that he wanted to sleep with her, Jonadab did nothing to discourage Amnon.

On the contrary, he gave him a piece of advice to help him attract Tamar to his bed. He advised him to lie in his bed, to pretend to be ill and to ask the King to send Tamar to him so that she would prepare cakes for him.

The King accepted and the rest is history. Amnon raped Tamar, Absalom (Tamar’s full-blooded brother) started to hate Amnon and had him assassinated.

And do you know the irony of all of this? It was Jonadab who announced Amnon’s death to King David, saying that Amnon died because of what he did to Tamar.

He had the nerve to tell that to King David and act if he wasn’t involved in the whole situation! You can Wonder what Jonadab’s intentions were towards Amnon.

Your friendships can determine your destiny

As the story of Amnon and Jonadab showed, you should choose your friends carefully. Your friends must be people who sustain your spirit and who should be able to give you good advice when necessary.

Your friends should be able to be straightforward and show you that you’re mistaken when you’re wrong. Your friends should be your keepers and have your best interests at heart.

Unfortunately, Amnon didn’t have this chance with Jonadab. Amnon had an unnatural feeling for his half-sister and needed help for this.

Instead, Jonadab encouraged an incestuous relationship and speeded up the violent death of Amnon. Sometimes, I am wondering what Jonadab’s intentions were.

Did he want to destroy the House of David by attacking Amnon, who was supposed to be the heir as the eldest son? Well, we all know that all the tragic events that happened in King David’s family are direct consequences of his own adultery with Bath-Sheba.

But this is another story…

Well, that’s all for today? How do you choose your friends? What do you think of the story of Amnon and Jonadab? Please share your view in the comments section below!

Stay blessed!

Read also:

Is It Lust of Is It Love?

Worthy Women Series #12: Bathsheba

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God bless you all!


  1. Feji ben says:

    I life one of the thing that has really helped and also destroyed may people,their dreams and aspirations are friends as most of the times they have have the ability to positively or negatively affect you that why one must be very careful when choosing them.thanks for sharing this info with us 

    • angelce says:

      you’re welcome!

    • Rhain says:

      When I was much younger, this was certainly the most recurring admonition that came from my mother. Perhaps, I was too young to understand but as I got older, it dawn on me the impact my choice of association has had on my life. The story of Ammon and Jonadab goes further to reveal how friends, wrongly chosen, can be the end of you. As you’ve said, our friends should help uplift and sustain our spirits. Thanks 

      • angelce says:

        You’re welcome!

      • Jon says:

        I can not agree with you more that you need to choose your friends carefully and that who you pick as a friend can set you back. On the other hand a good friend that can’t be replaced can be the greatest thing to ever happen to you. What is your number one determining factor for finding if a person will be a good friend?

        • angelce says:

          My number one factor for finding if a person will be a good friend would be his/her honesty. And thanks for the comment!

        • Shanta Rahman says:

          Many thanks to you for sharing such an excellent article with us and actually choosing friends should be really carefully. I have a friend and he is definitely someone who maintains my consciousness and gives me a lot of good advice when needed .He always corrects me and tries to correct me .I think my friend is protective of me and I express my best interest for her .

          Lastly I would like to say that everyone who reads your beautiful story will be greatly benefited by reading this and friends are very aware of choice.

          • angelce says:

            Thanks for your nice comment!

          • MrBiizy says:

            Thank you for sharing this post. The Bible has warned us to be careful the friends and company we keep. We should be friends to people that love God, people that will contribute positively to our lives, people that will help correct us when we’re going astray. No wonder the Bible warned us not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. It doesn’t matter if they’re our family members or not. We should let God guide and lead us.

            • angelce says:

              I totally agree !

            • James T says:

              While the real intentions of Jonadab is unknown, well I guess it’s very clear to everyone that he was a bad friend. He gave an evil advice to his friend which led to his untimely death. We should learn to be very careful when dealing with friends. And sometimes, we should know how to handle our secrets. This is a very big lesson to learn.

              • angelce says:

                I agree with you one must be extremely careful and learn to keep some things to ourselves 

              • Leon says:

                When you’re progressing or on the very bright side of life, you should be asking yourself these questions, “Is my best friend happy with my progress?” “Can I share my inner secrets with him?” “Can he be trusted?” Many more of these questions you should be asking yourself.

                Now let’s examine Amnon and Jonadab. Amnon is a Prince and an heir to the throne while Jonadab is just his cousin. Do you think Jonadab is happy with Amnon? Of course with his evil mind, he tends to be very jealous of Amnon. He knew the consequences of Amnon actions but still went ahead and gave him bad advice. This is to show you that he was waiting for the right opportunity to strike. Fortunately he got one. We need to be careful.