Wives submit to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and have Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself as a glorious church, not having a spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.
My dear Proverbs 31 women in Progress,
I hope you did well this week. As for me, I thought about the post I wanted to write this week and I realized that I talked a lot about empowering women with the Scripture, which is fine. But I didn’t talk a lot about our role in the society, as God designed it to be.
Therefore, I will write about it today with a comparison between masculine and feminine roles; so that we would understand better what God is expecting from us.
According to the Bible, a man should be a leader, a protector and a provider.
According to the Bible, a woman should be a wife, a mother, and a homemaker.
And according to the Bible, love should be the underlying rule of each of these roles.
Before we continue, I would like to precise some points:
- While the Bible says that a woman should be good homemakers, it does not mean that women can’t work. Nowadays, many women work and are good homemakers. Moreover, many homemakers have their own business at home. The Proverbs 31 woman herself is a successful entrepreneur. I remember one of my aunt who was a homemaker and developed a home-based business in which she was so successful that she even earned more money than her husband sometimes! But she always dutifully respected him and his role as a leader and provider
- Please note that the roles I am talking about here are very generic and don’t take into account individual situations, though I might be specific about some of them
- The leader
The man should be the leader of the home and in his marriage. His leadership role reflects the role of Christ with the Church. Indeed, as Jesus is the Head of the Church, so is the man with his wife and children.
Therefore, as a leader, the man will be responsible for establishing the family rules and for making the decisions related to the household. Of course, a real man will also talk to his wife before taking a decision. However, as the leader, he will have the final word.
Take a look at the role of leader as performed by Jacob. When he couldn’t bear his father-in-law’s behavior towards him anymore, he decided to leave his house and to go back to Canaan. However, before executing his decision, he consulted his wives Leah and Rachel first, so that they would also be able to give their opinion about his decision. When they gave him their blessing, he knew he could carry on with his plans.
A man who is an effective leader will always try to win his wife’s consent when making serious decisions. Never forget that.
- The protector
A man has to protect his family from harms and dangers. This is because he is physically stronger than a woman. I know that I am telling something cliché, since that we are taught that men and women can do everything alike, even strenuous work. But the fact is that men were designed to do hard work and to bear heavy burdens because his muscles are bigger – in general.
A man will get out there to fight for his family and protect them from difficult situations, which require masculine courage. And don’t get me wrong: women can be courageous too, especially when their families are at stake. But the Biblical role of a man is to be in first line to protect his wife and children from harm, and to even sacrifice for them. It is a component of his leadership, as explained above.
- The provider
In the Garden of Eden, the Lord already instructed man to work in the Garden and to keep it. Moreover, after sin entered into the world, God told man that he would take his food from the ground and that he would suffer a lot to get it. Therefore, man has been designed to work hard to provide for his family.
He should provide the basic needs of his family (food, shelter, clothes), as well as the necessary comforts at the best of their financial abilities. Of course, a man can meet challenges in his role of provider – for example, if he has financial setbacks, or if he lost his job – and then, his wife’s help will be welcome. However, providing for his family is one of the man’s chief role.
- The wife
We’ll go back to the Garden of Eden again! The Lord said that it was not good for the man to be alone and he designed a helpmeet just for him. Therefore, as Eve’s daughters, we are also supposed to be helpmeets to our husbands? That means that we are their most trusted companions and advisors. We support them in all their endeavors and we cheer them up when they are down. We help them to realize their full potential and to follow God’s plan for their lives.
And don’t worry if you are single. God is your Heavenly Husband. He will take care of you, protect you and provide for you. I am the living proof and I can guarantee that.
- The mother
Women have a body designed to carry babies – and our bodies remind us that every month! Beyond that, a woman will have the desire to nurture and to care for someone.
But what if you are single? You can always be nurturing, don’t worry! You can take care of your nephews and nieces and treat them like your children, for example. My nephew is very much like my own son. You can also be the sponsor of an orphan and take care of his emotional and financial needs.
As mothers, women also have an important role in the education of her children because she will be the first person responsible for giving them values and manners.
- The homemaker
Homemaking takes us back to nurturing. The Bible says that the wise woman builds her house. It is our duty as women to build orderly, safe and warm homes for our families where our husbands will find peace and comfort, and where our children will blossom and flourish.
And don’t think that because you’re a homemaker, you have a lesser contribution to the society. Raising responsible men and women is a huge responsibility. Every time I hear that homemakers don’t work because they are lazy and just want to be gold diggers, it always makes me angry. I’ll probably make a post dedicated to the skills you need to develop as a homemaker and you’ll be probably amazed at everything a woman needs to be proficient.
Also, being a homemaker doesn’t mean you can’t focus on developing your talents. You need to talk about other things with your husband apart from your household duties. You need to show that your world is not limited to your four walls.
Conclusion of the whole matter
Finally, masculine and feminine roles are very different, but they are equally important. If you’re a man, don’t feel too important because you have a brilliant career for example. If you are a woman, you may feel less important because you are a homemaker. Please don’t.
The masculine and the feminine roles should work in harmony for the glory of God, which is the end of all!
Well that’s all for today. I hope it wasn’t too cliché and that you won’t throw tomatoes at me after my post!
What do you think of masculine and feminine roles? Please share your point of view!
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By Helen Andelin
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